Archive for September 2011

A New York Rangers Hockey Match – What Fun!   2 comments

Last night I went to see the New York Rangers Ice Hockey team take one of the Czech republic’s best team apart on ice. I was going to say take them apart bit by bit, but the taking apart was a lot more aggressive and I have to say a lot more fun.

Now I feel I have a little understanding of what it must have been like to have been a spectator in the great Roman Games watching a team of crack Gladiators toy and then rip apart a bunch of dispirited christians, some Lions, and a whole heap of barbarians in one long action packed and very sweaty match.

I have to say I was surprised – I always thought that I was a clever cultured Cat but last night I was screaming for more, more goals, more punch-ups and more bone crunching action and I wasn’t disappointed I got more than I ever expected, wrapped up in my New York Rangers scarf, waving my New York Rangers inflatable hand and snuggly clad in my New York Rangers jersey.

Then it dawned on me, I was one small Cat shouting for the winning side, the was err… the New York Rangers if you haven’t guessed, surrounded by thousands of fans from the other team, surrounded by some pretty disappointed and disgruntled Czechs whose side was getting well and truly thrashed, outplayed and I have to say an Ice Hockey lesson.

The shouts from the Czechs around me had it seemed to me grown ever more threatening at first I thought that they were not particularly happy with their team HC Sparta but it slowly dawned on me that the shouts were directed um how can I put this – my way.

Unbelievably I think I had become the most unpopular member of either the audience or the opposing teams and that included a star player from the New York Rangers who had put a couple of pucks passed the butterfingered HC Sparta goal keep.

There was only one thing to do and that was to stop waving my New York Rangers inflatable hand then slowly and calmly slip out of my snug New York Rangers scarf and New York Rangers jersey and slip away.

Happily on my way out sneaking snakelike through the footwear of thousands of disappointed Czech fans HC Sparta very nearly scored a goal, by taking off their goal keeper and using an extra man in a desperate last attack, and that rare event managed to distract the angry mob who seemed to want to take out their frustration on a lonely Feline NY Rangers supporter.

Next week I think I want to go to a Football match if a really good foreign club is playing and annoy some more fans – well I do have nine lives don’t I?

The Cat World is such fun isn’t it? I have to say I haven’t had that much fun since going to the Ballet here in Prague which seemed more like a Miss Universe contest frankly, well the Czech Pavelinas (as I call them) are built like top heavy outhouses and where most ballerinas glide across the stage they move with a shudder and shake of the boards that would frighten any tourist who lives in a city prone to the occasional earthquake.

NY Rangers V HC Sparta Praha

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Horse Crap – A Delicacy In Ho Chi Minh City   2 comments

The really great news is that my long awaited soontobemillionselling book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ is going to be available very soon any and everywhere and that means you can buy a book either in paper or ebook form in the very near future.

Speaking of my long awaited soontobemillionselling book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue,’ a wonder of a little book written by a Cat, one of the places I visited was Vietnam though because of signs such as the one below and other divine bureaucratic blunders the chapter on Vietnam was ‘sponsored’ by the Socialist Republic of Vietnam and then removed by me from the printed edition. Did you know that the Socialist Republic of Vietnam’s motto is “Independence – Freedom – Happiness” – if you ever did!

It’s my fervent hope that you enjoy my latest book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ more than the menu item below and that you tell all of your friends to buy at least one copy and make this clever Cat very happy.

One thought that went through my furry head when I was sitting outside the restaurant in the heat and pollution of Ho Chi Minh City reading the menu below was this “what was the ‘Lime'” if you see what I mean, “do the Vietnamese serve a Citrus fruit with their Fried Horse Crap or is the ‘Lime’ on the menu the white powdery stuff that they add to cement, gardens and the graves of adulterers in days gone by?” Sadly to this day I don’t know because I didn’t order this menu item – what do you think I am stupid?

Don’t forget that like ‘Getting Out Excerpts from A Cat’s Diary’ ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ will make a wonderful Christmas present.

Horse Crap  A Delicacy In Ho Chi Minh City

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Personal Hairdressing In France   Leave a comment

There are very few words to either explain or describe this photograph from a Paris suburb and frankly even this genius of a Cat who writes books and who writes blogs doesn’t have any of them! But all the same I thought you my dear cuddly readers would giggle at the ridiculousness of our french cousins.

Personal Hairdressing In France

I believe that ‘french cousins’ are the cousins in a family that no one talks about you know the ‘special’ ones for whom everything is a challenge.

Big news, my wonderful masterpiece of second book (electronic and paper) ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ will be in book stores, on Amazon.com waiting for you to buy it in your thousands this coming week I believe. I will let you have more information as soon as I can but stand by with your pocketbooks open.

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Advertising Russian Style   Leave a comment

Although Russia and in particular Moscow is a tamer, more civilized place when compared to twenty years ago it’s a wild and dangerous place compared to America or England which have their moments of course.

But in either America or England you won’t find any personal physical threats in advertising, especially food advertising. The dreadful ‘love story’ coffee commercials on both side of the Atlantic come to mind here.

No one in New York or London is going to grab you by the collar and tell you to explore the taste of America or England – that as you can see from the shop window advert below is not the case in Moscow.

Explore The Taste Of Russia  Or Else She ll Get You

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Posted September 27, 2011 by The Cat in Uncategorized

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2 Day Rescue Operation To Save A Kitten – With Video   2 comments

VIDEO_DESCRIPTION



Click on the picture above or the link here to be whisked into the centre of the drama. Kitten Rescue

My latest amazing video on my wickedly wonderful website shows the dramatic rescue undertake by a team of five rescue workers and hundreds of concerned humans worked continuously for two days to rescue a frightened 7 week old Kitten who had become trapped under the floor of a supermarket in Gothenburg.

After being rescued the Kitten wasn’t able to comment on how or why it chose to hide under the floor of a supermarket, but then you have to remember that:

a) Cats like to explore.
b) Cats don’t have to confide in humans.
3) Not all Cats are geniuses.

You can read more about the dramatic rescue and see the amazing video – which is not in real time and so only lasts a few minutes and not 2 days (thank goodness) here Kitten Rescue. It’s a lot like the movie 127 hours starring James Franco but happily in this rescue no one lost a Paw.

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Damn Seagulls   Leave a comment

The Summer is coming to an end, but here we in Europe and I understand the UK are having what is known in some circles as an ‘Indian Summer’ I don’t know why it is called that or indeed if a hot dry spell in the Autumn is called an ‘Indian Summer’ in India for that matter.

I expect the Indians have a different name for a brief sunny period at the end of their Summer mainly because I have a feeling that the English overlords in the time of the Raj would have used the phrase and these days it would seem that anything English in India is a little frowned upon – apart from the use of the English language of course, the Indians, bless them, think that they speak marvellous English – oh dear if only they knew the truth!

I’ll give you a real life example when Andy from Bedford comes on the phone in the early evening when you are tying to stop the Dog eating the children’s supper and encouraging the youngest to actually do what the Dog wants to do, while answering the door to another batch of Jehovah’s Witnesses and keeping the Cat off the kitchen work surfaces, Andy from ‘Bedford’ calls from his New Delhi call centre pretending to be only 40 miles up the road.

Now this pretence is not only doomed to failure because of his pronunciation of the English language it is made worse by the sound quality of the ‘Skype’ like phone system he is calling on and of course the mayhem going on all around the family home, and made even worse by the fact that Andy from Bedford wants to “confirm that you are Miecester. Woodcock,” even though you have a woman’s voice (because you are Mr. Woodcock’s far better half and he is late again with his supper heading towards the Dog’s bowl with ever passing quarter of an hour).

Andy from Bedford ignores any attempt to shut him up including sarcasm and eventually swearing and keeps asking you “to confirm your phone number,” which you would never in a million years give out to some odd sounding heavily accented stranger on the phone.

Reading from his script Andy from Bedford blithely continues “I just want to take a coupole minutes of your very valuable time to discuss.”

You eventually tell Andy from Bedford to FO, slam the phone down and then get ready for his retribution, twenty calls spread over the next hour.

Opps I seem to have veered right off the point of this little blog which is this; Summer is coming to an end but it is still nice and warm, in England we call that an Indian Summer but I expect the Indians don’t because they wouldn’t like to be reminded of the English except to sell them broadband, financial planning or insurance on the phone.

Now that I am back on track I can finish by saying I thought the sign below reminded me of a trip to Clearwater Beach in Florida where the Seagulls are so aggressive that they not only steal your food they shower it back at you when they have digested it. Sorry about the wait for the punchline.

Damn Seagulls

What Are The Penguins Up To?   6 comments

You know that I have always thought that Penguins were not to be trusted and now I think I have found photographic proof from South Africa that proves my case!

What Are The Penguins Up To
Just ask yourself this; what are Penguins doing under vehicles? I bet they’re not practicing their skills as mechanics! And I don’t think that Penguins are under vehicles just because they are short enough to wander under them without bending. No there’s something happening in the Penguin world and I mean to get to the bottom of it, because as far as I am concerned the only animals that are allowed under vehicles are Cats if they are not moving and Hedgehogs if they are – poor things!

Lastly what are Penguins doing in South Africa? I thought that they liked colder climates – so they are now lurking under vehicles and being seen in warm countries, yes it is all beginning to add up isn’t it…


On another matter – well to be honest it’s the main reason for having a blog actually but of course us bloggers wouldn’t like our unsuspecting readers to know that we are only entertaining them so we can flog something – I need to remind all of you that it’s time to start thinking about buying my soon to be published second book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue.’

Now I know you are going to say that you didn’t expect a Cat to write one book and so two is something of a miracle but consider the miracle performed!

Yes that’s rights the world has seen a real miracle and my second book will be in the shops both real and webbed (as a real paper book or an ebook) very very soon, yes my masterpiece will be in the shops and on not only http://www.Amazon.com but also my www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com in time for Christmas which is just perfect.

I’m sure that I don’t have to do anything other than subliminally mention that my latest book makes just as good a Christmas present as my former one and how nice they will both look in the same gift wrapping do I?

Xmas Holly
Dear cuddly readers and potential book purchasers everywhere I do hope you enjoy what I hope is the first Christmas image you will see this year! May all of your Christmas shopping be without incident.

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