Archive for April 2011

Bet She Felt A Bit Of A Knob On The Balcony!   Leave a comment

It is true to say that I have deliberately avoided commenting on the royal wedding because it is tedious and every other idiot who can type has, but I couldn’t resist this little gem of a picture. It sums up the day and the dynasty.

I had heard that she gave good head but as a Cat I thought that she was generous with some of the best bits of left over fish!

They say that every picture tells a story and wow what a story this one tells! Poor little kate I bet she felt a bit of a knob on the balcony, she should have told whatever his name is to wait until they got inside. But then that’s the royals for you, if they want something they want it now!

One of the many reasons that they have to go!

Bet she felt a bit of a knob on the balcony

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Posted April 30, 2011 by The Cat in Uncategorized

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American Freedom I Knew Someone Was responsible   Leave a comment

I always thought that once America had defeated mad old King George III’s evil Death Star they would go on to do great things and now and again they shine, sadly as the picture below demonstrates America even outsources the manufacturer of its ‘freedom’ these days.

At this rate in ten years time poor old America will be smelling funny, rocking in a chair, mishearing things and talking loudly about the good old days just like Great Britain.

American Freedom

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The Most Welcoming DIY Superstore   Leave a comment

England and the English have a reputation of being unwelcoming, reserved and abrupt all wonderful character traits which I admire, but even this Cat can see that sometimes being unwelcoming can be counter productive!

Well Look Its Simple really You

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Posted April 26, 2011 by The Cat in Uncategorized

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Dreadful Google Strikes Again   Leave a comment

As you may or may not know I hate Google for so many reasons, but the main one apart from them pushing their noses into your business is the fact that the ‘make’ me have Google in the Czech language when I log on to Google.com.

Now that is all well and good if you are Czech! I am sure Czech is a fine language and just as good as any other human language although it does seem to be a little over endowed with odd shapes that sprout out of some of the letters in strange places.

Unfortunately I don’t speak Czech and so I expect when I type in Google.com to my web browser to get Google.com in English or something quite close like American which is as close as you can get to English these days although American is spelt badly.

It is a shame then that Google.com is automatically routed via my browser to the Czech language site Google.cz because my IP address is Czech. Even when I block the web address Google.cz in my browser’s privacy settings I still get ***king Google.cz and have to manually alter the mistake.

It’s not exactly freedom of expression because Google.cz blocks my desire to visit Google.com to say nothing about freedom of speech – I am sure that they are ripping up some sort of constitutional right here and so I need a clever, devious and not very scrouplous lawyer to sue them for damages because constantly having to type in Google.com after I have logged on to Google.com and got Google.cz is driving this cat bonkers oh and of course my usual no win no fee lawyer is apparently indisposed for 10 years conducting Penal research from the other side of the bars if you know what I mean!

Having said all of that I do like it when Google makes a balls up and I hope you enjoy this one, it is a cracker.

The first picture below is the Google.cz homepage and has some dreadful illustration on it, the significance of it, of course, is totally above my head – but hell after all I am just a Cat so what do you expect.

The second picture is what happened to the pretty twee little picture when I typed in Google.com – just proving that all of the great flash animators don’t work at Google.com. whatever.

Dreadful Google

OOPS!

Dreadful Google 2

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Typical Chinese Attitude!   Leave a comment

I think that this sign displays just what China thinks about visitors don’t you?

Visitors unwelcome China

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Posted April 22, 2011 by The Cat in Uncategorized

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Happy Harry!   Leave a comment

Now we know what made Harry happy don’t we! And it’s terrible. Apart from Harry always looking a little smudged when you went in his shop I always thought that Harry was an upstanding type of chap!

Just goes to show doesn’t it!

Now we know what made Harry happy

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Posted April 20, 2011 by The Cat in Uncategorized

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Guinea Pig Hunting Step by Step   2 comments

Guinea Pig Hunting The Cat’s Step by Step Guide

  • Step One Stalk Guinea Pig – Check

  • Step Two – Pounce on Guinea Pig – Check

  • Step Three – Wrestle Guinea Pig to Ground – Check

  • Step Four – Don’t whatever you do fall asleep…

Guinea Pig

About the Author

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Cat kind, his sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or at Amazon.com or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

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